Request: Ashton; finding out about my self harm?
Hey I hope all of my followers know that my ask is always open if you ever want to talk, or you can ask for my kik.
PLEASE DO NOT READ IF YOU WILL FIND THIS TRIGGERING IN ANY WAY POSSIBLE.
You led on top of the covers of your bed, the soft skin of the back of your legs resting on the harsher fabric of the sheets. The thin material of your shorts were pulled to the top of your legs, your sleeves pushed to your elbows as your face had become damp with tears. Slowly, your fingers traced from your elbow to your arm and you winced as the slightly risen scars turned into newer cuts, angry red marks that you had inflicted upon yourself.
Anonymous asked: Can you write a one shot where Ashton selfharms and his girlfriend finds it and yeah..one like that you can edit it to whatever:) thanks x
So I combined the above request with my initial plan to write a oneshot adressing the hate Ashton’s been getting. I hope you don’t mind anon :)
Real talk though: The hate Ashton received absolutely infuriated me so I felt the need to write a cute oneshot about it. Remember, words hurt. No matter the person, no one deserves hate. Be kind with your words please.
TW: Self Harm
I’m slouched on the sofa, watching a rerun of Friends, when I hear the front door click open. In steps Ashton, a hiccupping, sniffling mess. I frown and crease my eyebrows in worry, rising off of the couch. I watch as he nudges his sneakers off before I ask, “Baby, are you okay?”
He lifts his head a fraction and glances at me with puffy eyes. “No.” he sniffs, shuffling towards me. He wraps me in a tight hug, ducking his head down so that it rests in the dip between my neck and shoulder.
I grip him tight, trailing my fingers over his scalp. “What’s wrong?” I coo. I maneuver him to the couch, lying down so that we’re in a cuddly heap.
“It’s just,” he sighs, “everyone’s mad at me and I’m getting all of this shit on twitter.” He sniffles again. I feel his nose rut against my throat. “All I did was stick up for the band and now everyone hates me because of it.”
I shake my head. “Everyone does not hate you. I don’t hate you. Luke, Calum, and Michael don’t hate you. And from what I’ve seen on tumblr, the whole 5SOS family is on your side. They’re just petty little girls Ashton. Don’t listen to them.” I kiss the top of his head.
He nuzzles further into me. “I try not to, but when the hashtag, KeepCuttingAshton, is floating around, it’s kind of hard not to.”
“Wait what hashtag?” I pull back to look at him, confused. “There’s a hashtag telling you to cut yourself? When did that start?” I’m surprised. I knew that Ashton had been getting hateful comments the past few days, but this hashtag was news to me.
“Like two hours ago. Haven’t you been on twitter?” he creases his eyebrows.
“No, no I haven’t. My phone died and I left my charger at Mike’s yesterday so I wasn’t able to charge it. God Ashton, I can’t believe people started something like that.” I smooth his hair back and plant a firm kiss to his forehead. He buries his head back into my chest.
“It just hurts ya know?” his voice is muffled. “I’ve struggled with hurting myself and the fact that they think I should just… God Y/N I almost cut myself today.” My skin starts to get damp and I know that he’s crying now. “I’ve been clean for almost two years and I was going to cut myself because of some stupid fans’ hashtag. How pathetic am I?”
I wiggle down so that my face is level with his. “You’re not pathetic at all. You’re a human with emotions and you’re sad because people are being mean to you and that is perfectly okay.” I plant another kiss on his forehead. “It is perfectly okay to be sad, just don’t let the sadness consume you.” I grip him to me tight. “I don’t want to lose my silly, giggly Ash.” I tickle his ribs. I can feel him smile against my shoulder.
He removes his face from my neck. “You’re not going to lose me. I promise.” He runs a hand over his face. “I’m gonna… I’m gonna stay off of twitter for awhile, ya know, let the shitstorm blow over.”
I nod my agreement. “That sounds like a good plan. I’ll send out a tweet letting the fans know that you’re okay, but that you just need a small break from twitter.”
He murmurs his thanks, patting my hip. “Can we watch the Lego movie and cuddle? It’d make me feel better.” He turns on his puppy dog eyes.
“Of course we can watch the Lego movie and cuddle.” I give a serious nod.
He smiles softly before turning around so that I’m the big spoon. “Woo Lego movie.” He whisper yells.
I laugh before sighing heavily. How could such a sweet, sweet boy receive so much hate?